Crush Crushed?

Okay. The thing is that I wanted to talk about my crush, but I don't even want to know where to start.

...

All right, Here it goes.

So at my college (yes, this life-form goes to college somewhere on the planet Earth... a law school ... hehe don't ask why I got the time to blog this. lol) there is a guy who's really nice, good-looking (or may be just okay-looking to some people ), tall, dark tan skin tone, really smart ( yes I know that  a law school is full of smart people, didn't really have to bring that up i know), humorous, a gentleman, and he really loves his mother. Well, now you know that I was talking about my crush. I fall head over heal when ever I saw him, I was struck dumb whenever I try to talk to him, and these symptoms should have stopped already. That is because it has been going for almost a year now, but sadly, it didn't. The feeling grows stronger, so think that I must have loved him. Yes, the feeling is too strong.

However, life isn't like a nice block butter that is flawlessly creamy. While I was falling for everything he did, a rumor has been going around my faculty that this guy is gay. Of course I heard the rumor and did not believe any of it because I was accustomed to hearing that straight guys being call gay, which happens a lot in my family. We tend to joke on each other's sexuality for fun, but strictly speaking, we are all straight people. 

Then one day, this guy that I had mentioned earlier when up to a junior in our class and said things like "You know what? I am tired of being in this university. Girls are everywhere you turn to. Sometimes I just feel like being suffocated when I see too many girls." And literally, I was sitting right in front of his face when he said that. Unconsciously, I just let out a laugh, audible, of course. He was like "Were you eavesdropping on me?" So I said things like "Well, you were loud enough to be heard." So he went like "Well, don't get me wrong . I'm not like that. Seriously." Guess what, I believed him, unquestionably. Of course some guys are a bit uncomfortable went they are in the middle of groups of girls all the time. That's normal, right?

Same class some weeks later, he was doing a pose to many guys like he was proposing them to marry or something. Well, that's normal right? I mean, guys usually do those things for fun, to scare other people away and all. And the other time when a friend asked him his name, he answered it in a harmlessly girlishly cute way. I don't know what he was thinking, like were you just trying to look innocent and harmless because most people see you as a serious academic person? I don't know. That might be it.

Moreover, one thing that I don't really understand is that people keep saying that he really likes a boy cheerleader in our faculty. I know that he must be liking someone, but he never says who. I even suspect him not denying statements that would literally means he likes the cheerleader. Not that he ever agree to those statements, not that I heard of. His close friends openly made fun of him that he's gay and all, but he was always angry and denied it. When a quiz I did said that my type of men is the nice, good-looking gentleman kind, he would said things like "Oh that is just like me." I was like ---> O.O" (happy, confusing, dying inside, wanted to yell out "YES, YOU ARE THE ONE, BUT ARE YOU GAY???")

I know that some straight guys are a bit too feminine because they are gentlemen, and some people just don't fit into any social standards and all. I mean ... normally he looks like a normal nice guy who's often critical to everything he sees.

Finally, I still thinks that he's a straight guy, a weird one though. I don't know, may be love does the magic, like they say in the bible "when perfection comes, imperfection disappear" X )

P.S. Right now I'm a bit content with how I don't post videos on my blog because it'll be hard for people to come and read these stuff. However, if anyone is reading this, leave a comment or something. Then I'll know someone's reading my life. lol 

PEACEXX